HE DOES EXIST!

Dearest Mr. Claus,

I hope all is well up there in the North Pole. I know it’s your busiest time of year and billions of other little girls and boys are writing to you, demanding gifts and such, so I will make this brief.

It is with much delight that I write to you. I would like to start by thanking you for granting a pre-Christmas wish that has been on my list since October. Thanks for ending my detention sentence a day and a half early! (Although I did ask for an earlier date than this… I’m not complaining, I’m just pointing out our miscommunication issue.) To aid in your endeavour in fulfilling the remaining portion of my wish list this year (without further mishaps) I will recap and include pictures for your reference.

I hereby tender my newly revised wish list:

1) A White Fendi Selleria handbagNOTE: An authentic one MADE IN ITALY, not a replica like last year’s Balenciaga Handbag MADE IN THE NORTH POLE. I know the elves make quality handbags, but it’s just not the same.

2) An Hermes Kelly bagNOTE: I know spending at this fiscal quarter for North Pole Inc. is at it’s maximum, but $6500.00 for a Kelly is not an unreasonable request.

3) A Gucci violet calf 'Bouvier' hoboNOTE: Yes, another handbag. There are 365 days in the year after all, and I only have a month’s worth of purses. That’s only 8.2% of what I should have.

4) Snow in Ski Resort Areas Only
NOTE: My paid lessons are going to waste without snow in the Snow Belt. Otherwise I’m very happy with the plus 7°C for winter in Toronto.

5) A Pony (the Andalusian variety... if we are being breed specific)

NOTE: I know we’ve talk about this before. But I’m much older now and I can take better care of a Pony. I won’t forget to feed it, like I forgot to feed Muffy the goldfish. I’ve been practicing my pet caring skills with a dog for two years now… and trust me, that dog has never missed a meal.

6) An open Roundtrip Business Class Plane Ticket to Fiji.
NOTE: Or any other Polynesian country.

7) Spending Money (must be given in combination with above wishes)
Note: To keep wishes 1, 2, 3 and 5 from being empty and to use as a bartering tool for wishes 4 and 6.

AND FINALLY… I wish for:

Peace on Earth, an end to world hunger and all that intangible warm hearted stuff that is on the list of all good girls and ALL Beauty Pageant contestants.

Sincerely Yours,

G.I.M.S